Golden approaches to overcome fear, shyness and depression
30 July 2020 by Diana Popa
Becoming a Leader required discipline, strong mindset and being in control of your emotions.
Not feeling worthy
We have all gone through struggles in life. It seems, however like the scars from the past leave their marks heavily in people’s lives and, very often people don’t manage to overcome them, at least not as easy as we would have liked to.
Did it ever happen to you that you receive a compliment and wondered whether you really deserve it? Why is that? Why is there even a doubt? Did it happen to you that someone criticized you for the work you delivered, for being too emotional or for not trusting yourself enough? And you actually believed them? And not just that, you even begun whispering it to yourself again and again until you made this a conviction of yours. You started doubting yourself and lowering your self-esteem more and more, day after day. Once you feel this lack of confidence, you may also begin felling ashamed to express your views, to put out to the world your ideas. You never speak up, never say how you would like to live.
Who gave anybody the right to say what they think about you and plant doubts inside your head? Well, let me tell you this right away. No one has the right to tell you how you should be, what you should say, how you should behave, who you should be. But for whatever reason, we are giving others this power and what happens is that they end-up influencing our mood and the way we feel about ourselves. And so we go through life, trying to impress those who shouldn’t be allowed to be in our mind or, worst, in our lives, to start with.
Not feeling valued and appreciated
The list is long. We have many negative thoughts, many insecurities and challenges. Let’s take a moment to talk about the feeling of giving a lot, yet still feeling that we are not receiving enough. Not enough in our personal or professional life. We often fight to gain a place where we think we would feel appreciated and valued for who we truly are. But somehow, it seems like this feeling never comes in our path. And the more we fight, the more we feel we lose ourselves. We lose our intuition, we are told we need to take decisions, we need to be strong. Women take over the masculine energy and men give up to their dreams, living a life according to other’s opinions. They tell us what we need and how to lead our life. We need to build a family, have children, find a job, give up to our free time and take care of the house and those around us.
Feeling stuck
As time passes–by, one day we ask ourselves: What happened? When and why did I allow all these to happen? But, more importantly, what should I do now? Should I give-up and just pretend to be happy for having a roof under my head, even though I don’t feel in peace and fulfilled? Even worst, why am I dependent on others? Why do I feel I am fighting for nothing? Why am I stuck in a relationship which doesn’t make me happy anymore, yet I seem, to be comforting myself for simply having someone nearby?
On the other end of the spectrum, why is it that often people try to convince themselves they are better off being by themselves and give up on the dream of finding the ‘right person’? Are you really better off by yourself? Did you forget all those nights when you were wishing that someone could hug you and tell you how wonderful you are? Why did you give up on having a partner who values you and appreciates you even when you think you are not at your best? So my question is: When did you allow yourself to have negative thoughts and doubts about what you can and cannot have in life?
You may be thinking right now: “How can I get over this situation? I cannot just leave everything behind and run away to build my dreams. But, more importantly, if I wish to start over, where do I start?
Not knowing what your purpose in life is
If you are in your 20’s, you are doubting about the path you should be taking. This is normal. People told you to go to school, have good grades, graduate, find a job and possibly even told you to find a partner and have children. So you may be thinking, is this really what I am supposed to do in this life. Is that all it is for me? How can I find my purpose?
If you are in your 30’s, you have probably chosen a path already. You graduated, you found a job and now you start feeling like it is not that great as they told you. Life is not easy at work, colleagues are not nice to you, those you report to do not appreciate you, your financial rewards do not allow you to engage in those activities that give you comfort and pleasure.
If you are in your 40’s or 50’s, you are starting to wonder about the decisions you took already and the reasons you may not have pursued your dreams in the earlier phases of your life. You may also be wondering: Should I now start a new career, follow a new path? Does it make sense doing so now when I have so many responsibilities? Thoughts which may lead you to believe that it may be too late to change and start over.
Acceptance and change
If these are questions and doubts you are having, it is now time to take a moment to reflect on what you have achieved so far, how your life turned out to be and what, in fact, you would have liked it to be. It is time to take a stance, make a first step, and embark on your change-journey.
This change, however can only become reality, if you give yourself permission to dream big, if you get rid of all the negative thoughts and all the criticism as this will free-up space for building something new.
How should you go about embarking on the change-journey? First, you need to acknowledge everything you have built so far. Fill your soul and inner self with gratitude. Celebrate who you have become and accept that whatever you lived in the past, helped you become who you are today. Second, you need to start thinking of the positive events that happened to you and tell yourself: if I want to erase all the struggles I went through, I need to delete also the positive ones. Would I like to do that? Will I still be who I am today if I would do that? If the answer is no, then it is time to accept that whatever happened to you was for a reason. Be thankful for what you achieved and start acknowledging how amazing you are.
Develop your self-esteem
Once you have gone through the process of discovering who you are and how valuable you are, once you have taken the step to fill your heart with good feelings, you are ready to take your life to the next level. You have built self-esteem and you now know what you are worth, no matter what those around tell you. You no longer need to look for their acceptance or their compliments, because you are the one giving them to you. You know you are enough by yourself, you know everything you went through, you know you deserve the best. You deserve to live a life the way you imagine it.
Live with passion and purpose
When going through the process of self-recognition and self-acceptance something magical happens. You discover your gifts and you clearly see what you are meant to do. It becomes clear that you have something to share with the world, something unique. You feel this is what you were meant to do and, even, this is why you went through struggle. You find this moment where everything is happening at the right rhythm, when fighting is no longer necessary, as everything you need comes to you in a natural manner. You have found your ‘Why’. Now you know that nothing can stop you from living your dream life.
Improve your financial situation
The most amazing thing that happens is that once you discovered your ’Why’, you start reaping the rewards you always dreamed about. All you need to do is work with your mind, reprogram your beliefs and build affirmations that can guide through your doubts. Once you believe you deserve it and start living your passion and helping others, your financial situation will also start to improve. Because you are where you are supposed to be. Because you allowed yourself to live an extraordinary life. Because you gave yourself permission to overcome the fears and the barriers you thought were stopping you. Because you are now free to enjoy the life the way you wanted to.
If you are still wondering how you can achieve all what is described above then our program 'Secrets of designing tomorrow’ is specifically designed for you.
What are the benefits for joining our program?
- Discover who you are so that you understand how to improve the quality of your life
- Gain clarity in all the areas of your life so that you know where to focus your attention
- Learn what makes us happy so that you can create your own happiness and live a fulfilled life
- Learn to acknowledge yourself so that you gain self esteem
- Learn to celebrate your winnings so that you start realizing your greatness
- Change the negative patterns into positive ones so that you can eliminate self-doubt about how valuable you are
- Overcome fears and take action so that you can live the life you always dreamed about
- Accept that your past helped you become who you are today and you have incredible knowledge to share with the world
- Learn the power of gratitude and social connection so that you feel in peace every day no matter what is happening around you
- Design your life so that you can start taking control and own it
- Identify your ‘Why’ so that can live your purpose and meaning in life
- Set up goals so that you stop procrastinating and live the life you wish for
- Learn to offer gifts to yourself on a daily basis so that you feel how much you deserve being happy and fulfilled.
Does this stuff really work?
Here are some statistic that could answer some of your doubts.
What makes us happy?
A study shows that based on our age we have different needs. Money is definitly not something that will make us happier on the long term. It certainty helps having stability and the life quality we wish, but your fulfillment will come from other places. We should be looking to improve our financial situation but also to find purpose.
Will I leave longer if I find my purpose in life?
Studies show that you your survival rate is 15% higher if you have a high purpose in life compared to a low purpose.
Is it too late for me if I am in my 50’s?
Here are some statistics that show the opposite. Older people seem to be happier than younger ones.
If you are in your 20's it is time to change these curve. If you are in your 50' now it is your time.
What do others say?
Oana (USA)
"I always knew I had a purpose in life. Joining Diana's program has given me more clarity, has helped me define my goal and my true ' why' that keeps me going. It has also given me the tools to enable me to take action. You need to be around people with an empowering mindset and this is it! Diana is so genuine and so knowledgeable and you can tell that she truly cares about your success. Thank you for the journey.
Habeebullah (India)
"I would like first of all to thank Diana for her efforts to help people reach their life goals. I did not know her before, but I saw an opportunity to join her program where everyone has been awesome. I am sure everyone has some dreams and goals but they need coaching in order to get there. Honestly during the week in her program, whilst being through some challenges I have realized that I am powerful enough to overcome the obstacles and reach each and every one of my dreams. I wish you to be happy and have a prosperous life ahead".
Ioana (Romania)
"Diana is very passionate about what she does. She likes to help people and companies to grow. Throughout the seminar I felt transformed and happier, more productive and the company will grow because we as leaders develop."
